


I'm Just A Kid And Life Is A Nightmare

by mccolfer



Category: Andi Mack (TV)
Genre: Gen, M/M, andi and buffy are there briefly, jonah is at frisbee camp
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-15
Updated: 2018-08-15
Packaged: 2019-06-27 14:01:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15686856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mccolfer/pseuds/mccolfer
Summary: TJ is secretly pop punk trash and hates this small town and just wants to eat pizza, wear Vans, and crowd surf. He's actually a huge fan of Bowie's band, Renaissance Boys, and receives some helpful advice. Also, there's a cat.





	I'm Just A Kid And Life Is A Nightmare

**Author's Note:**

> This is VERY self indulgent, fair warning. I essentially wrote this scene in my last Andi Mack fic, but in this one TJ is way more into music. I just have a soft spot for my bisexual icons (bicons) Bowie and Bex and the guys playing the Renaissance Boys in the finale were so fucking cute? I already wanted to write a niche fic where TJ was pop punk trash and I figured the show giving me a band in canon was just a sign. So here's a fic that's like 75% retcon for the finale. 
> 
> The title is from [I'm Just A Kid](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_GOR5gvQwDI) by Simple Plan because that was the most pop punk lyric I could think of when I was posting this on ao3.

“No way!” A very excited voice yelled from across Red Rooster.

Andi, Buffy, and Cyrus were all just doing their usual loitering around Bowie’s place of work without buying anything and the last thing they were expecting was for an enthusiastic TJ to interrupt their conversation with Andi’s dad.

“You’re Bowie Quinn!” TJ continued, looking at Bowie in awe.

Bowie seemed just as confused as the rest of them. “Uh, yep, that’s me…”

“You filled in for Jax in Renaissance Boys when he left to have a baby!”

Bowie’s face lit up from the explanation. “Oh my god, and you know who I am?”

“Of course! I mean, I kind of know everything about Renaissance Boys, they’re my favorite band.” TJ was more excited than any of them had ever seen him. It was kind of weird. “But my mom only finally took me to a concert last year and you completely stole the show with those solos, man! Why aren’t you on tour with them right now?”

Bowie’s face fell at the harsh reminder that he wasn’t on tour, literally living his dream with some of his best friends. But his smile soon returned when his eyes met the reason he was here. “Coincidentally, I also left to have a baby.” He wrapped an arm around Andi.

“Why didn’t you tell me your dad was _Bowie Quinn_? I would have cared way more about your whole family drama that the school was weirdly invested in if I knew that.”

“Do you guys know each other?” Bowie asked, gesturing between the four and TJ.

“That’s TJ.” Andi replied shortly. Realization washed over Bowie’s face and TJ very quickly felt the most guilt he’d ever felt for what he did to Buffy. He already felt bad enough, but now a member of his favorite band was going to hate him.

“So, my reputation precedes me.” TJ joked tentatively.

“I’m afraid so.” Buffy replied smugly, “Come in guys, we got to get going anyway. The movie starts soon.” The four friends all said their goodbyes to Bowie and began walking towards the door.

Cyrus stopped to turn to TJ, smiling gently, “I’ll text you.” He promised.

TJ smiled sincerely in return, at least one person didn’t hate him for all his stupid decisions.

“I’ll uh, just get out of your hair, then.” TJ said quietly to Bowie as the kids left. He knew not to overstay his welcome and clearly this guy would want nothing to do with him.

“No, wait,” Bowie said, holding his hand out, “talk to me a bit. You like music?”

TJ grinned hopefully, “Yeah, it’s not really something I get to talk about a lot. My mom isn’t exactly excited about going to concerts with me so I’m pretty much stuck missing shows until I can drive or I make an older friend.” He explained, “Though I did convince her to let me go to Warped Tour since it’s the last one, and since there’s a tent for parents to chill. I just had to promise to reapply my sunscreen every two hours, and send her a picture to confirm that I did.”

“I know that feel, dude.” Bowie nodded, thinking about all the concerts he snuck out to go to when he was a kid. “What kind of music do you like then?”

“Mostly rock, pop punk, but I’m not some whiny emo kid.”

“Hey, don’t knock being whiny and emo until you’ve tried it!” Bowie laughed defensively, “Sometimes that’s the only way to truly feel your emotions.”

“My emotions are usually more angry than sad though,” TJ responded quietly, not sure why exactly he was opening up to a stranger, even if he did play with his favorite band.

Bowie shook his head, “But you see that’s where sad music comes in handy!” He rushed over to a shelf holding records. “Most of the time when you’re angry it’s just a more aggressive sadness. That’s why it’s good sometimes to just make yourself the saddest you can be and just have a good cry. It’s much less destructive than being the maddest you can be and… I don’t know, punching a wall or something.” He ranted as he picked up some albums. “Dashboard Confessional, Modern Baseball, Mayday Parade, Jimmy Eat World, Real Friends. You can’t go wrong with some classics like Simple Plan, My Chemical Romance, or even Blink 182 occasionally. You should really try some of these bands out!”

“Uh, I’d love to. But maybe I’ll stream some songs before buying a whole album.” TJ said, holding up his phone.

Bowie scoffed, “You kids! You don’t even realize how easy you have it. All the music you could ever want at your fingertips.”

“Well, it’s not like you don’t have access to Spotify.” TJ replied.

“But I didn’t when I was your age!” Bowie exclaimed, “I had to buy a CD and just hope it wasn’t a waste of money based on other people’s reviews!”

The two shared a laugh as Bowie started putting the records he pulled off the shelf back.

“Hey, thanks a lot for the recommendations, seriously.” TJ spoke up after a moment of silence. “Like I said, Renaissance Boys is my favorite band of all time. They were the first ever band I got into. So, you being nice to me despite all the bad things I’m sure you’ve heard… it means a lot.”

“I’ve actually heard a lot of conflicting things about you, TJ, not necessarily all bad.” Bowie assured him, crossing his arms. “Of course, Buffy and Andi were quick to tell me all about your basketball drama. But Cyrus also came to me for advice when you started being “weirdly nice” to him.” He uncrossed his arms momentarily to add finger quotes around the phrase. “And Jonah told me how you got him help when you saw him having a panic attack and kept his secret.”

“He was having a panic attack?” TJ asked, his forehead wrinkling, “I guess that’s better than him having a seizure or whatever I was thinking. It’s not like I was just going to leave him there to die.”

“But Jonah was under the impression that you were going to run and make fun of him to the whole school.” Bowie explained.

TJ grimaced at the thought, “I’m not _that_ mean.”

“But how would he, or anyone else for that matter, know that based off your previous actions?” Bowie wisely let the question hang in the air, giving TJ time to think.

“I have no reason to be mean to Jonah though.”

“But you had reason to be mean to Buffy?”

“Well... yeah. She’s better than me. At everything. But most importantly, basketball.”

“Maybe instead of taking your insecurities out on other people you could learn to accept them, or maybe try to better yourself. You know, if you think Buffy is better than you, then you have something to work towards.”

“I know…” TJ sighed, he’d heard all this from Cyrus before, but it was kind of nice hearing it from an actual adult and not just a kid acting like one. TJ didn’t really see his dad much since he was always working, Andi was lucky to have one as nice and caring as Bowie. “Do you make a habit of giving fatherly advice to random teens?”

“Well, I missed out on being a dad for 13 years so I guess I’m doing my best to make up for it.” Bowie chuckled sheepishly.

The sound of the door opening kind of shocked both of them, reminding them where they were.

“Right, I’m at work.” Bowie said, giving a welcoming smile to the person that just walked in. “Hey, make sure you listen to at least one of those bands, okay? And think about what I said.”

TJ nodded, watching as Bowie went off to talk to the customer. He went to unlock his phone to go into his Spotify app when he was distracted by a text from Cyrus. He kind of figured Cyrus’ promise of a text meant later like tomorrow, not fifteen minutes later.

**How did things go with Bowie after we left?**

**aren’t u at the movies**

**Previews TJ**

**buffy made it seem like u we’re gonna be late**

**She gets mad if we miss the previews, she takes movie going very seriously**

**she takes everything seriously**

**True. But answer my question, I’m dying to know**

**bowie is a cool dude he reccomended me some bands**

**How did I not know you’re into music?**

**theres a lot u don’t know about me underdog**

**I guess you’re right…**

**u should come to my house soon i actually have something i want to talk to u about**

* * *

“So basically, you just ask the people around you to give you a boost up and then everyone in front of them carries you until you get to the front. Then you shout some lyrics to the band and by the time you get to the front a security guard will grab you and put you on the ground. Usually you run right back and do it all again.”

The horror on Cyrus’ face grew stronger and stronger the longer TJ explained crowd surfing to him.

“What if no one helps carry you?” He asked anxiously.

TJ shrugged, “There’s always a very real chance you could get dropped.” Cyrus squeaked at the thought, making TJ laugh. “But most of the time, people don’t want to have you dropped on top of them, so they’ll participate even if they don’t really want to.”

“I just don’t get it…” Cyrus shook his head, “If I was at a concert, I feel like I payed to hear this band, not to carry a million people the entire time.”

“If you don’t want to deal with crowd surfers, you shouldn’t be in the middle of the crowd then.” TJ offered, still debating on whether or not to explain moshing to Cyrus next. He didn’t think the poor kid’s heart could handle the idea that you just open a pit so people can flail around and bump into each other or run really fast in a circle.

“I gotta say, this is a side of you I didn’t really expect.” Cyrus said thoughtfully, looking around TJ’s room curiously. It was the first time he’d ever been in TJ’s house, and honestly, it was the first time TJ ever had someone other than family in his room. But Cyrus didn’t need to know that.

Part of his room was pretty predictable; a toy basketball hoop on the back of his door, some sports trophies lined on his dresser, a poster of a basketball player Cyrus couldn’t name if he tried. But there was also several band posters, one of Renaissance Boys but that didn’t have Bowie in it from what Cyrus could tell, an impressive record collection next to a new school record player, a desk that had a couple books and a sticker covered laptop on it. It kind of felt like two different people merged together to create one room, but also, that was a ridiculous thought. TJ wasn’t a one dimensional person who only existed to like basketball, he could have other interests.

Maybe Cyrus never considered TJ that far in depth for a reason, because right now he was a little weak in the knees and it probably wasn’t for the best.

“Oh, Kobe!” TJ suddenly exclaimed, jumping off his bed and rushing to his door. He bent down and picked up a small black ball of fluff. Cyrus could immediately hear purring the second TJ had his hands on it.

“A cat…” Cyrus said simply, trying not to let the waver in his voice show.

“This is Kobe!” TJ said excitedly, bringing the cat closer to Cyrus, “The reason why that spot on the bed that you’re sitting on is covered in black hair.”

Cyrus jumped up from the spot, “Sorry, I’m in his spot, I’ll move.”

“Her, actually, and it’s fine. She’s very friendly.” TJ insisted, holding the kitten out in front of Cyrus’ face.

The other boy back away from the cat immediately, laughing nervously.

“What’s wrong, you’re not allergic are you?” TJ asked with concern, bringing the cat back in and holding her like a baby. She sounded like a little motorboat purring so loud in TJ’s arms.

“No, I, um, I’m just a little scared of cats.” Cyrus explained, which was an understatement. He was _terrified_ of cats. Even the sight of Kobe nuzzling her little face against TJ’s wasn’t heartwarming enough to melt Cyrus’ very scared and icy heart.

“It’s nice seeing you like this.” Cyrus said as TJ placed the kitten down on her spot on the bed. She immediately started kneading the mattress, and TJ gave her one last scratch on the head before turning to his friend. “Really. You should show other people this side of you more often.”

TJ turned his gaze down to his feet, “I know… that’s actually what I wanted to actually talk to you about. I was thinking maybe you could help me figure out a way to apologize to Buffy? I just really want to make things right between us. There was no one else I treated as badly as her, because, well…”

“I know.” Cyrus nodded, smiling supportively. “You apologizing to Buffy would make me so unbelievably happy! I think you should definitely start with a one-on-one game of basketball between you two. If she sees you guys can play together, she'll have to rejoin the team!”

As Cyrus giddily started forming a plan, TJ felt like his heart was growing three sizes. There was something about the other boy that just made him strive to be better. He didn’t want to be some generic mean bully jock archetype. Cyrus knew there was so much more to the other boy and he desperately wanted to tear down TJ’s walls, and TJ desperately wanted to let him.

About halfway through their plan development, TJ heard his parents come home and ran downstairs to talk to them. Leaving Cyrus all alone with Kobe who was sleeping peacefully on TJ’s bed.

“So, this is bad, huh?” Cyrus said in the general direction of the cat. “These feelings… again.”

He hesitantly brought his hand over her, using one finger to pet along the middle of her head. Her eyes opened slowly, causing Cyrus to jerk his hand back. She was unbothered by the movement, instead standing up and stretching for a bit. Then she walked forward, placing one paw on Cyrus’ thigh and looking up at him expectantly.

“Hello, that’s my leg.” He said to her, trying to build up the courage to pet her by just letting his hand hover. She had enough of that pretty quick, just pushing her head into his hand. “Alright, guess I’m petting you now.”

“TJ’s pretty cute right?" Cyrus continued talking, "It’s only normal that I would develop feelings for a cute guy who’s nice to me, right? That’s like, how life works.”

Kobe didn’t say anything in response, but she did bring her other paw up to Cyrus’ thigh. He graduated from head pats to a nice full body pet, lightly grabbing her tail at the end.

“Maybe you’re not so scary after all, just like your owner.”

The kitten replied by crawling further onto Cyrus’ lap, plopping down on her back with her belly up.

“Don’t try to pet her stomach, she won’t like it.” TJ’s voice came suddenly from the doorway.

“How long were you standing there?” Cyrus asked, retracing back all the things he said.

“I just came back up the stairs, don’t worry.” TJ teased. “Whatever secrets you told Kobe are safe with her.”

Cyrus laughed half-heartedly, “Let’s get back to planning.”

“Oh, do you want to stay for dinner? My parents were asking.” TJ asked, “They love when you come over, I swear they ask about you like every night.”

“I’ve been called the Parent Whisperer before.” Cyrus said.

TJ laughed, “Really, by who?”

“Mostly just myself so far, but it'll catch on.”

* * *

For the first time in a long time, TJ felt pretty good about himself. His plan with Cyrus to make things right with Buffy was in motion and once that was complete, TJ was free to have Cyrus as he pleased. And he’d come to realize he just kind of wanted Cyrus around pretty much all the time.

He also had taken to listening to some of the bands Bowie recommended to him and found that where was something so liberating about emo music. Where he once saw only weakness and whining, he now had a respect for the artists who could tap into their raw emotions and just lay everything out on the line like that. It made TJ wish he could do the same, but he had kind of been told all his life that boys weren’t really supposed to have any feelings at all. It was a hard mindset to break.

It took TJ about a week after meeting Bowie to find some time to visit him at Red Rooster again. He not only wanted to thank the man and buy some new albums for his collection, but he also kind of wanted to get some more advice for how to handle his situation with Buffy. TJ nearly fainted when he entered the store and nearly ran right into the chest of no other than Rafe, the lead singer of Renaissance Boys.

“Oh, sorry kid, I don’t know why we’re all crowded around the entrance like idiots.” He apologized, placing his hands on TJ’s shoulder as if to steady him. TJ’s eyes manically darted around, seeing Rafe in front of him, Micah the drummer to his left, and Guthrie the bassist to his right.

“Uhhhh…” TJ said, his mind completely shut off.

“Bowie, I think Rafe broke this kid.” Micah called out, waving Bowie over from the register.

“I didn’t do anything!” Rafe insisted, “He ran into me!”

“Oh, TJ.” Bowie said as he walked closer to his former bandmates and saw the person they were surrounding. “Oh! TJ!” He repeated as he remembered how much TJ loved Renaissance Boys. “Give him some space guys.”

“I’m sorry!” TJ blurted out as the guys all backed away slowly in unison. “Oh my god, I’m being so embarrassing. You guys are just my favorite band, like in the whole world.”

“Bowie! Why didn’t you tell us you had a customer who is a fan of us!” Rafe asked, looking positively offended.

“Okay, you guys _just_ got here.” Bowie explained, holding his hands up in surrender, “And I _just_ met TJ the other day. You back to buy some albums I recommended you?” He asked, clapping TJ on the back enough to knock him out of the starstruck stupor he’d fallen into again.

“Right! I am.” TJ agreed, feeling his cheeks heat up as he continued to try to process the fact that his favorite band was right in front of him. “Why are you guys even, like, here?”

“Already tired of us, huh?” Guthrie said sarcastically.

TJ shook his head aggressively, “No! I mean—“

“Ah, don’t let him get to you, kid.” Micah said, cutting off TJ’s rushed apology. “We’re just passing through town, thought we’d pay our dear friend Bowie a visit.”

“Oh, you know what, you guys should totally come to dinner with me." Bowie suggested excitedly. "Meet my… Bex, finally, a-and my daughter Andi.” His eyes met Rafe's and they just kind of stared at each other for a bit, both wearing an expression that TJ could really decipher. 

“You sure we won’t be intruding?” Micah asked, interrupting the moment between the two. 

Bowie waved him off, “Nah. They’re probably just gonna order a few pizzas like they always do.” He pointed proudly at himself, “I’m the only one who can cook in this family.”

“Now that’s why I miss having you on tour with us!” Guthrie said, “Anything you made was better than the same five fast food places we rely on now.”

“I don’t seem to remember that same sentiment after The Great Tour Bus Fire Of 2016.” Rafe replied with a wicked grin in Bowie’s direction.

“I told you then and I’ll continue telling you, that fire was _not_ my fault!” Bowie insisted, pointing his finger at all of them as they just laughed at him.

“As much as I’m sure our boy TJ here is enjoying our banter…” Micah said as the laughter died down. “Maybe we should get out of Bowie’s way and let him help his customer.”

“Oh,” TJ said, he kind of forgot he existed for a moment. “Well, I actually came because I wanted to ask for some help, but I can just go.”

“No!” Bowie exclaimed, “These guys aren’t doing anything but taking up space. Tell me what you need, buddy.”

“Yeah, maybe we can help you too!” Rafe said, shooting a look at Bowie. “Since, you know, all we’re doing is taking up space.”

“Tell me I’m wrong!” Bowie replied, chuckling a bit as he held his arms out.

The three of them remained silent, Guthrie briefly coughing.

“Exactly.” Bowie smirked in his defeat, turning back to TJ. “What’s up, kid?”

“So, Cyrus and I have been planning to find a way for me to apologize to Buffy without actually saying I’m sorry.” TJ explained, “Because she hates those words.”

“Ah… girl troubles, huh?” Rafe nodded, “That’s what it always is.”

“Um, no.” TJ laughed, the thought of Buffy in a romantic light was so foreign to him, he truly never even considered it. Thinking about it now just seemed… wrong. “No.” He repeated.

“Hey, it’s fine, my man.” Micah said, “We all have lady troubles sometimes.”

“I am _not_ having lady troubles though.” TJ laughed mirthlessly, “I mean, if anything, I’m having guy troubles.”

All four of the men raised their eyebrows in shock, it would have been funny how synchronized it was if TJ wasn't so terrified that he just made his favorite band hate him by oversharing.

“Well, we can help you with guy troubles too, dude.” Rafe suddenly suggested, now even more excited than before. Behind him, Micah looked ashamed of how he reacted and was nodding quickly. “You know, Bowie and I were a bit of an item for a little bit. But then he got an email from his _Bex_ and we both kind of mutually agreed he was going to be hung up on her forever and was a lost cause.”

TJ looked between Rafe and Bowie, trying his best not to imagine them together. It was a little too much for him to take right now.

Bowie was just nodding solemnly, “And I’m still sorry, Rafe.”

“Hey, and it’s still no big deal, Bowie.” Rafe insisted, they briefly seemed to have a conversation with only their eyes. TJ understood a bit better what had been going on between them before.

“So…” Bowie said, deliberately turning his attention back to TJ. “Cyrus, huh?”

TJ felt his cheeks heat up again, he looked down at his shoes, trying to hide it.

“Oh, it’s _definitely_ Cyrus.” Micah teased, “Who’s Cyrus?”

Guthrie spoke up, “Yeah, why do you know so many children, Bowie?”

“My daughter is 13!” Bowie shrugged, “I like to be involved in her life. Cyrus is one of her best friends.”

“Tell us about Cyrus!” Micah insisted enthusiastically, grinning warmly ear to ear.

“I’d love to but right now I have no chance with him until I apologize to Buffy, as mentioned before.” TJ couldn’t believe he was standing here telling Renaissance Boys his life problems.

“Buffy is Andi’s other best friend.” Bowie explained, filling in some context gaps.

“What did you do to Buffy?” Guthrie asked bluntly, his arms crossed.

TJ looked down again, “It’s… complicated. She joined the basketball team and I was jealous that she was so good so I was kind of mean to her.”

“So you’re a bully?” Guthrie scoffed.

“No! I mean, I don’t know.” TJ stumbled over his words. “I guess... I used to be. But, because of Cyrus, I’m trying to be better.”

“That’s very admirable.” Micah said, patting TJ on the back proudly.

“Yeah, you’re what, 13?” Rafe asked.

“I’m 14.” TJ corrected half-heartedly.

“Exactly, you’re still figuring out who you are. I remember how angry I used to be at 13, I probably wasn’t the nicest guy either.” Rafe reassured him.

“If only I could get Buffy to realize that.” TJ said, “I basically need the greatest apology ever. Cyrus seems to think that just playing her one-on-one in basketball would make her feel better, but I was _really_ awful to her and she’s _very_ stubborn.”

“Well, you know what the best way to apologize is?” Micah asked, grinning at his bandmates.

“In a song!” They all chorused, including Bowie.

“Alright, slow down, guys.” TJ chuckled nervously, “Just because I like music doesn’t mean I’m any good at it. I can't even sing, let alone play any instruments.”

“What are you talking about? Everybody can sing.” Rafe insisted confidently.

Guthrie sighed, “You always say that, Rafe. It’s just not true!”

“You could sing if you really tried _Guthrie_!”

“No I couldn’t! And some people just don’t want to! Some people just want to be a bassist!” Guthrie said, more passionately than he had said anything else this entire time.

“What about a rap?” Micah suggested peacefully, clearly having heard this fight before.

“You want me to _rap_?” TJ asked incredulously, raising his eyebrows.

“Yeah man, it’s easy. You don’t have to be like Eminem or anything.” Micah said, “You could almost deliver it like slam poetry. Rapping is easy because you can always brush it off as a joke if you’re bad or say you’re trying something artsy.”

“I… guess?” TJ said, not really wanting to flat out reject his idols trying to help him, _again_. “But what would I even say? I can’t write a rap.”

“Lucky for you, there’s four songwriters in the room.” Rafe smirked, gesturing to his bandmates.

“I’m not trying to take up more of your time than I already have.” TJ said, chuckling bashfully.

“No worries man, we need something to do before dinner tonight anyway.” Micah shrugged.

“Yeah, while you’re doing that I can actually get back to work.” Bowie said.

TJ stared him down, he didn’t want the only person he was slightly comfortable with leaving him alone to be an idiot in front of Renaissance Boys. But Bowie gave him nothing in return, instead running to help the person that had been wandering aimlessly around the store for most of their conversation.

“Tell us more about Buffy.” Micah said as Guthrie pulled out a small pad of paper and a pen. The three of them smiled supportively at TJ, ready to help.

So TJ did.

**Author's Note:**

> Like a couple weeks later Bowie gives Bex, Andi, Buffy, Cyrus, and TJ all tickets to see the band in Salt Lake City and TJ asks him to dedicate a song to Cyrus from him. Then they kiss or whatever. I started writing this scene but it was getting a little too cheesy and ridiculous so I gave up.


End file.
